He's Mr. Electric Fence

Hey Mr. Electric Fence,

I saw you sitting outside your home with a dorky haircut and your docked ears and could not help but feel sorry for you. Why did you watch me pass you by without a sense of anger?

Were you born spineless or was this a condition you acquired from having life shit on you time after time?

I guess I'm so full of questions for you because I've never seen anyone sitting out in the cold when a fireplace or central heating was within grasp.

Anyway I better get going. The wife's got a whole lamb in the fire place and we're going to skin it and use every part in our functional everyday lives. You know, family stuff. I won't keep you with my personal issues anymore.

Best!

Signed,
Your Passerby

P.S. Don't call me the beeswax gatherer. That's not my name anymore.